...it's not dark yet, but it's gettin' there...
As you know, I did a marginally funny spoof of an e-mail to Lindsay Lohan well over a year ago. I got so many comments from Lindsay fans asking me to put them in touch with her, I had to close the comments. Now I just get tons of emails. It's tapered off to about one a week now.
Here's a new twist, though. Some emailers think I'm Lindsay! Which is inexplicable, especially if they've read even one or two posts of mine. Oh well, it's better than people thinking I'm Ashlee, which would truly be insulting.
From: "[redacted to prevent embarrassment]" [*]@hotmail.co.uk
To: coolconnector20@yahoo.com
Subject: to lindsey.lohan
Date: Fri, 10 Mar 2006 15:00:50 +0000hiya you dont know me but im one of your fans i always feel sorry 4 you when you get ppl taking pictures of you in the street when u want them 2 leave you alone. I would like 2 be in one of your films later in the years please could you add me email or send an email to me i aint sure if you are lindsey lohan or not if you are dont worry i wont telll any1 your email your in safe hands with me i look abit like you actually lol. i wish i was as pretty as u. ppl always say i do abit. i know alot about you that ive read on internet and makeup books i read.I wish we was m8s i always listen to your music and i think your are a good singer. Ive heard about your dad and i hope everythin goes well if it already has :)
my email addy is [*]@hotmail.co.uk
as i live in the uk lol of course :P
sorry 4 taking your time wish your ok and hope your brother and 11 year old sister is ok well guess shes nearly 12 now :) i want to be a celeb like you but i aint sure where 2 start and i also wants 2 live in america but my
parents moan that i need some1 2 support me as i want 2 live in florida loved all your movies i aint seen herbie yet but the clips i have seen are kool :)sorry if i am rambling on lol i would like to know your addy so i can talk to you but if u think im a pain following you, then you dont need 2 add my email addy.
nice talking to you lindsey bye bye xxxxxxx
omg your are lindsy!! omg i new it y didnt u telll us b4!!!
i new lindsy was republican thats is awsum1!!
hey can u giv me britny speers addy i want 2 email her 2.
Posted by: The Law Fairy on Mar. 11, 2006oh, shoot. I should've misspelled "republican" -- I doubt Lindsay fans know what a republican is.
I really should put more thought into my sarcastic comments.
Posted by: The Law Fairy on Mar. 11, 2006Aww, how cute. Send the kid an email just so she doesn't think she's being ignored by her idol.
Let her know that NO-BO-DY has her email address who she she hasn't given it to, 'cuz as soon as she starts getting fan email she'll change it. But she can always send her a note by snail mail at:
Lindsay Lohan
c/o Richard Lovett
Creative Artists Agency LCC (CAA-LA)
9830 Wilshire Blvd
Beverly Hills, CA 90212
USA
Or you can just ignore the whole thing and let the kid wonder if she actually got in touch with Lindsay Lohan. That might be better. Who cares.
Posted by: Tuning Spork on Mar. 11, 2006You're actually Lindsay Lohan?
Now we know why you hate Britney so much. Me-ow!
Posted by: Victor on Mar. 11, 2006Hey, no one here cares a whit about Lindsay Lohan (whoever the Hell she is)!! We're all Annie fans.
Besides which, she doesn't have freckles.
Posted by: shelly on Mar. 12, 2006Sorry, Annie. I found several snail-mail addresses but have no idea which (if any) are current. The only e-mail address I could find is the contact e-mail at her Bright Light Foundation. I have no idea if anything sent there will ever get to Goldie, though.
Posted by: Tuning Spork on Mar. 12, 2006