...it's not dark yet, but it's gettin' there...

July 14, 2005

This Blog Has Two Audiences

Want a laugh? Go check out the comments to what has become my most popular post ever: "My E-Mail To L!nds@y Loh@n."

Lately, every couple of days someone has been commenting to that post. i guess google searches for L!nds@y have increased since the Herbie movie came out, and my site pops up as the number seven result in a search for the sudden waif's e-mail address.

Most of the people who arrive and comment do not seem to have a clue, and think that i am either L!inds@y herself, or a close friend of hers. It's funny. For instance, this chick thinks L!nds@y is in the habit of giving her phone number out to random strangers:

Dear Lindsay or whoever is reading,
Hey, what's up? I would like to know more about Lindsay Lohan. If anyone know her phone no & e-mail or one of them pls give it to me.If this e-mail reads it lindsasy lohan ,can u give me your phone no & e-mail pls. Thanks . Bye

Here's someone who took my satirical post way too seriously.

u honestly think Lindsay would respond to that.. and wat makes u think tht by telling her u noe a cool guy shes gonna care.
Well, my post may have been satire, but i wasn't lying when i said that L!nds@y would totally dig on Ken Wheaton, if she only met him.

My post has become a discussion board of sorts for a totally different audience, most likely international, and very obviously young. i am beginning to worry about the state of English language education in the world, now that i've seen a sampling of what passes for spelling and grammar.

well i thing lindsay is the best actris in the world .and herbie fully loaded is the greatest movoe i ever saw. all the movies of linsay i h ave saw but i just want to know if anybody has her email adress i will be great to have it thanks bye
Crikey! i have to admire anyone with the intestinal fortitude to sit through the entire L!nds@y oeuvre. What fascinating conversations one might have. i imagine they might go like this, for instance:

"i love how the auteur combines editing and cinematography in idiosyncratic ways as a commentary on outmoded concepts of "reality" [here make the "quote" gesture with fingers] utilizing both the explicit and implicit narrative meanings in the film Freaky Friday."

"Oh yes, but the subtlety of The Parent Trap is at once delicious and painful as an expression of ambivalent attitudes toward the ideological issue of violence, drawing upon conventions of cinematic realism to characterize the plot structure and mise-en-scene exposition of theme and characters."

"Exactly. I wept."

But most of the comments contain the same question: "How can i get in touch with L!nds@y?" Since i have been silent on the matter, as i can't answer that question, other commenters have offered their advice.

I have several adresses thay all clame to be lindsays I emailed her about amillion times I have mary kate and ashleys but who knows if they are real.
Now there's a question i can answer. They are not real. All four are fake. And spectacular, from what i hear.

Posted by annika, Jul. 14, 2005 | TrackBack (2)
Rubric: Celebrity Watch & On The Blogosphere


I wood rathar have Sandra Bullocks email if u r the one who has that kinda stuff. Do you like work with the stars?

Too Funny. The strangest search phrase I've been found by is, "dog ate my homework image".

I guess the Sandra Bullock reference gives away the fact I'm not a teeny-bopper female. For that matter, so does using teeny-bopper.

Your site always makes me smile. Thanks.

Posted by: Jim on Jul. 14, 2005

Shit, your site always gives me a hard-on, no wait, that's Roger's site... so how about Sandra Bullocks number?

Oh yeah, Mary Kate and Ashley... after they swallow, they barf it back up... ruins the whole thing.

Posted by: Casca on Jul. 14, 2005

You are just too funny.

Posted by: Brad on Jul. 14, 2005

Jim, I live just a couple of blocks over from Sandra B. I don't know her email address, but I guess I could always drop something directly into her mailbox (if I were in anyway a fan of hers...I'm not...too nasally and whiney with no breadth or variety to her acting ability)

Annie, I have two diff. posts on Ashless Simpson (one on her Super Bowl fiasco, the other on a petition to ban her from every singing again), and both of them elicit the same types of teeny-bopper comments as your LL posts...

Posted by: Robbie on Jul. 15, 2005

Annika, is this really worth a few hundred hits? :P

Posted by: Mark on Jul. 15, 2005


Posted by: dawn summers on Jul. 15, 2005

C'mon, annika! You're in California! Lindsay's in California! Don't you two know each other?

Posted by: Victor on Jul. 15, 2005

Didn't Paris have Lindsay's number?

Completely off topic - a year ago, our church's high school youth group went to Florida. When the other groups found out that our group was from California, they asked our group if they surfed. Finally, one of our group wrote "I surf to school" on his backpack. The guy lives in Rancho Cucamonga, which is in the 909, fifty miles away from any beach.

Posted by: Ontario Emperor on Jul. 18, 2005

haha, classic.

Posted by: Patriot Xeno on Jul. 20, 2005

Call me evil. I even adopted Jim's favorite word "teeny-bopper." However, I left off the dash, which will probably cause a flame war even worse than the Lindsay-Britney battles.

When I was 9 or 10 years old, our class was assigned to interview someone. Two of us in the class decided that we would interview President Richard Nixon. To this day I don't know why we didn't get the interview. (Actually, one student did interview the Arlington, Virginia Superintendent of Schools. But Paris Hilton didn't know him.)

Posted by: Ontario Emperor on Jul. 21, 2005