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April 18, 2006

New Slogans For The Democratic Party

I just got a spam e-mail from Tom Vilsack, Democratic governor of Iowa, and I presume a future presidential candidate. Don't ask me how I got on his mailing list, I have no earthly idea.

But apparently his PAC has been running a contest for the best ten word slogan to represent the Democratic Party. The contest is now down to the final ten slogans submitted by ten "activists."*

Funny thing about the finalists. Four of them aren't even ten words long. Typical Democrats. Always thinking the rules don't apply to them.

Anyways, I think it's unfair that we conservatives weren't allowed to get in on this contest. Do you all have any ideas for ten word slogans that encapsulize the Democratic Party?

I'll start it off:

"Democrats - because national security makes my head hurt too much."

* I love that word. To me it's a euphemism for jobless looney.

[cross-posted at The Cotillion]

Posted by annika, Apr. 18, 2006 | TrackBack (0)
Rubric: annikapunditry


How about:

The Democratic Party: Out of touch with reality since 1932.

Posted by: Go 4 TLI on Apr. 18, 2006

How about a bastardization of a great Monty Python (aka Cleverness Incarnate) quote:

We will cut down the mightiest Shrub WIIIIITH.... red herrings!

Posted by: The Law Fairy on Apr. 18, 2006

Actually, Vilsack is the governor of Iowa. The governor of Ohio is a Republican, Robert Taft XXII, although most Ohio Republicans are trying to forget that right now. Amazing how Canadians know that kinda stuff, huh?

And as far as your slogan goes, I wouldn't exactly be running on the president's national security priorities right now. Unless of course that slogan is, "The GOP, so sure that we'll win the War on Terror that we'll give the enemy seven of our ports as a handicap."

The Dubai ports deal really hurt message delivery on national security. Yes, the Democrats are fucking pathetic, but do you really want to give them that kind of a mulligan?

Posted by: skippystalin on Apr. 18, 2006

Iowa, Ohio, what's the diff?

Posted by: annika on Apr. 18, 2006

"Up With Democrats! Other Six Words Were Taxed Off Slogan"

Posted by: Thomas Galvin on Apr. 18, 2006

"Vote Democrat, because nothing but special interest groups matter anymore!"

Posted by: Mike C. on Apr. 19, 2006

I just read their list. I see that nothing has changed. They are the perfect enemy. They have no bench, and politics is about personality, no message so nothing to stir the American heartland, and no hope of winning, which will bring me peace in my dottage.

The diff between Iowa and Ohio? 13 Electoral votes my dear.

Posted by: Casca on Apr. 19, 2006

Democrats: Let's lose the war and get the majority back.

Posted by: shelly on Apr. 19, 2006

Democrats: Let's lose the war and get the majority back.

Posted by: shelly on Apr. 19, 2006

Democrats: Lying commie bastards and proud of it.

Posted by: Blu on Apr. 19, 2006

Democrats: Huh?

Posted by: BobG on Apr. 19, 2006

Democrats: Proudly serving trial lawyers, union thugs, unqualified minorities, & sexual perverts!

Posted by: Blu on Apr. 19, 2006

"Iowa, Ohio, what's the diff?"

Heeeey! There's plenty of diff! One farms corn, the other farms co....

... wait a minute...

Okay! One's in the midwest, the other's...


IGotIt! Pick something so totally arbitrary and so incredibly random that there no way in hell it can match! I pick: The last syllable of their state university's mascots! GOTIT! One's a Buckeye, the other's a Hawk...


I give up. What the hell is the diff?

Posted by: ElMondoHummus on Apr. 19, 2006

Oh, wait, yeah. Slogan, 10 words or less:

"Anyone but Bush. Because we'd rather hate than make sense."

It may not be fair to a bunch of moderate, sane Democrats, but it sure as hell sums up the Kos wing of the party.

Posted by: ElMondoHummus on Apr. 19, 2006

Annie's post says Iowa. Where's the talk of Ohio coming from?

Posted by: Blu on Apr. 19, 2006

I corrected it Blu.

Posted by: annika on Apr. 19, 2006

That's the kind of prompt editing that separates you from the competition....

Posted by: Blu on Apr. 19, 2006

Yes, and I hit "publish" so many times, the RSS feeders must hate me.

Posted by: annika on Apr. 19, 2006

The Democratic Party, Racial divisivness, and Class warfare since the 1830's.

Posted by: kyle8 on Apr. 19, 2006

Slogan: Vote Democrat, becuase it worked so well on West Wing. [I'd add something about writing the story, but 10 words and all]

Oh, and the difference between Iowa and Ohio is that Ohio is just big enough to have pro sports teams in two cities while Iowa gets a triple-A team.

Posted by: KG on Apr. 19, 2006

Actually, national security is making the Republicans' head hurt.

Free yourself from slogan slavery: Become an Independent

Posted by: will on Apr. 20, 2006

Some of the slogans were better than others. I laughed at the outright lies ("The Democratic Party: People are our only 'Special Interest.'"?), but at least some of them are capable of telling a story (the one I liked the best was "A Strong Nation and Economy through Fairness, Reason, and Community."; it sums up all the "It takes a village" stuff).

Despite all of the Republican problems in coming up with a cohesive story (Harry Reid didn't invent the felons clause), the Democrats are even more incompetent.

It might be more challenging for each party to come up with one word, not ten. For Democrats, perhaps they'd choose "Community." Republicans could choose "Freedom," Constitution Party "American." Too late to think of what the Greens and Socialist Workers would come up with. The Libertarians would say "We don't need no stinking one word limit! We'll say whatever we want, and take as long as we want to say it! So there! The Constitution did not impose any limits on our freedom of speech...."

Posted by: Ontario Emperor on Apr. 20, 2006

Hey i'm still thinking of em,

"The Democratic Party: Where no message is a good message!"

Posted by: annika on Apr. 21, 2006