Fash-ism Tutorial For The Maximum Leader

The Maximum Leader had a really cute post yesterday, where he confessed to a certain confusion regarding my Fash-ism shoe poll on the sidebar.

Something has been bothering your Maximum Leader for WEEKS now about Annika's site. That damned Fash-ism poll near the top of the sidebar. What the hell are some of those things?

Your Maximum Leader knows they are all footwear. He understands basic pumps and boots. But what for the love of your Maximum Leader are: Mary Janes, d'Orsay pumps, t-straps (which sound quite sexy btw), peep toes, slingbacks, strappy sandals (which sound sexy in a granola-crunchy-Greatful-Dead-chicka way), kitten slides, and mules (which don't sound sexy at all).

. . .

So your Maximum Leader asks you... What are these other things?

Your Maximum Leader will inquire of Annika as well. But he is befuddled.

Well, for the last word on women's fashion, especially footwear, i should refer all inquiries to the girls at Candied Ginger, who are the real experts. But, i thought that i might be able to help Maximum Leader out in my own way, with the following tutorial, complete with visual aids. i was unable to find enough examples solely from my own closet, since it's a complete mess, and half of my shoes are still back at my parents (including a very fine example of the t-strap pump). At any rate, what i didn't have, i googled. So read on, and learn, dear Maximum Leader:

i'm pleased to learn that The Maximum Leader is hip enough to know the difference between

this basic pump:

and this basic pump:   which every girl owns.

That's a good start.

But as he might have guessed, there are many subsets to the general category of "women's dress pump." But if The Maximum Leader were to construct a Venn diagram of all the ways in the various styles overlap and intersect, the end result might look like a spirograph. So i'll keep it simple.

These are some cute Mary Janes: on the cover of the latest Macy's catalog.

However, those should never be confused with this Mary Jane: of course.

The d'Orsay pump is a little more obscure. Being a fan of museums (see his sidebar),

The Maximum Leader should already be familiar with the Musée d'Orsay in Paris.

Leave it to the French to come up with the equally stylish d'Orsay pump. Here's an example:

and here's one with an ankle strap:

The distinguishing feature is the lack of side panels. Very sexy.

T-straps are easy to figure out.

The strap looks like a T, thus:

Don't ask me to explain why the g-string doesn't look like a G, though.

We're talking about shoes today, so let's try and focus.

Peep-toes are simply open-toed pumps, like these: Did you notice that those shoes were also t-straps? See how fun this is?

Slingbacks are any shoe, flat or heeled, that has an open back secured by a strap around the heel.

Like so: and so:  and so: 

Strappy sandals should be self explanatory.   and i happen to love these.

On the other hand, kitten slides are not very self-explanatory.   Kitten refers to the short heel, and a slide is anything with a mininal strap up front. Very comfortable, although not my favorite style.

This is a mule,   but so is this:

and this one,   which i covet immensely. It's gorgeous. i just adore mules.

And finally, judging by the poll numbers, the ever popular Boot:

Either pointy toed:   or Ken Wheaton safe:

(Ken has this irrational fear of lethal looking shoes.)

It has been my pleasure to provide this service for you, Maximum Leader. If you have any further questions, please do not hesitate to ask.