...it's not dark yet, but it's gettin' there...

August 03, 2004

Come On - He's Not That Hot!

The Kerry sisters are apparently all lubricated over that has-been-never-was actor Matt Ben Afflack. (Apparently, they never saw Daredevil, which can cure any starstruck Afflack worshiper of their unfortunate condition.)

The felling seems mutual, as Ben is probably seeing Benjamins in the eyes of the two ketchup queens. Or maybe he's simply all ga-ga over Alex's ta-tas. Or, perhaps most likely, he envisions himself as the next Peter Lawford or Arnold Schwarzenegger, and plans to make the leap from entertainment to the world of power politics via strategic marriage.

Here's a window into Ben Afflack's idea of wit and charm, for what it's worth:

In the new issue of Harper's Bazaar, Ben blathers that he finds the sisters 'funny,' 'smart' and 'absurdly beautiful.'

Affleck, who interviews the duo for the maggie, admires Alexandra's 'soft features, brown hair and a gentle, willowy carriage that complements her demeanor.'

What demeanor is that? Is it the one where she acts "like a spoiled diva" and demands to be let into an overcrowded club with her and Vanessa's thirty person entourage?
As for Vanessa, he raves: 'She looks, with her flaxen hair, almost like a Nordic milkman's child.'

Gag us.

Indeed! That prose is as turgid as Ben's cock must have been at the convention, when he became the meat in a Kerry girl sandwich.
'Ben and Vanessa were in the front of the box in the external seating . . . He had his mom with him but he and Vanessa were yukking it up. They were laughing and having a good time. Very cozy. They looked like affectionate pals.

'Within 15 minutes, Alexandra waltzes in, she sees them and lunges across the partition to get in between them. She greets Ben with the big hug and kiss. This was clearly making Vanessa very uncomfortable, she would walk away and come back. It was like two junior high school girls vying for his attention. This was clearly a case of sibling rivalry.'

Get over him, girls. He ain't that hot.

Via Son of Nixon.

Posted by annika, Aug. 3, 2004 |
Rubric: Celebrity Watch


This reminds my rant about Hollywood not making any movies about 9/11-

"Don't you Hollywood guys believe in making money any more? Don't you see value in remaking "The Towering Inferno" with twice the towers and 100 times the plot? Don't you think women want to see Ben Affleck carry his hose up the stairs, save the lives of numerous New Yorkers- then die heroically and tragically, shaking his fist and shouting a defiant oath at Osama Bin Laden as he hugs to a brave young woman? You're dang tootin they do."

Maybe I was wrong. Maybe women don't care about Ben Affleck and his hose.

Posted by: gcotharn on Aug. 3, 2004

Annika is absurdly beautiful.

The Kerry girls are homely. (They look too much like their father). But they have used their wealth to good effect to look passable among fire-breathing Democrats.

Posted by: Jake on Aug. 3, 2004

what did you say after Ta-Ta's??

Posted by: jimi on Aug. 4, 2004

You know, my boyfriend's mom and I were discussing this, and how he had mentioned he would like to get into politics.

I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.

Anyways, yeah, I totally agree -- he's not all that. Ever since Bennifer, I'm like, who cares about this guy?

Posted by: Amy on Aug. 4, 2004

re: Vanessa,
If you missed it, check THIS out!

Posted by: Tuning Spork on Aug. 4, 2004

A little off topic, but does anyone else think that VS model looks like a female version of Ben Affleck?


Posted by: Key on Aug. 6, 2004

i don't know that she looks like Ben Afflack at all, but i simply love that tank! In aqua white and/or pink.

Posted by: annika! on Aug. 6, 2004