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January 24, 2006

Unsolicited Advice For The New CW Network

We already got a country and western network on cable. It's called CWT. Not everyone likes country music, but I have a solution, which should help bring in more viewers.

Add David Gilmour to the Gilmore Girls' cast. This will bring in the casual rock & roll viewer who would otherwise channel surf past the CW network.

On a somewhat unrelated subject, Time Warner cable service sucks logs. Comcast is way better.

I would also suggest tinkering with the names of some of CW's sitcoms. Smallville should be changed to Well-hungville, to capture the more discerning female viewer. And Everybody Hates Chris should be Everybody Loves Chris. Why would I want to watch if you're already telling me I'm not going to like the main character? And it goes without saying that America's Top Model should be changed to America's Top Nude Model, or maybe America's Top Drunk Nude Model. That's a no-brainer and a sure ratings getter.

Finally, fire Les Moonves. I don't like him, and I never know how to pronounce his last name. It sounds like he should have been a character on WKRP.

Posted by annika, Jan. 24, 2006 | TrackBack (0)
Rubric: Arts


Well, Les Nesman was a great character, But I think Moonves is pronounced Moon-vez. Anyway, he is no different than a hundred other tv execs. they never have a lick of sense.
Right now I only watch the discovery channel, news talk shows, history channel, sports, and the Sci-fi channel: (only on friday nights) ((BTW the new Battlestar Galactica is absolutely the most incredible characer driven, on the edge, series I have ever seen. Even if you are not a scifi geek its a hoot))
However, your idea of Drunk Naked Sluts is a winner! I forsee that you could use the current fascination with gambling to bundle it together.
Picture this: Young, good looking models and actresses play a variation of strip/drinking pokur. When they lose they have to take a shot of tequila and take off something to put in the pot.
In between hands they have to jump on a trampoline. Now that is what I call ratings gold!

ps. you have a filter that made me change the name of the card game to pokur, how weird

Posted by: Kyle N on Jan. 24, 2006

Don't you mean CMT?

Posted by: Matt on Jan. 24, 2006

Kyle, you are clearly a genius!

Posted by: Casca on Jan. 24, 2006

CMT - CWT, same diff.

Posted by: annika on Jan. 24, 2006

I haven't watched UPN in a while (apparently hardly anyone else did either), but isn't that the network that really emphasized the laugh track, even when the dialogue was inane? And they're gonna get their hands on Seventh Heaven?

DAD: Lucy, why aren't you working on your sermon?

LUCY: Why so, Daddy-O?

[Inane laughter]

MOM: There's someone at the door.

LUCY: It might be the pizza delivery guy.


[Inane laughter]

Posted by: Ontario Emperor on Jan. 24, 2006

I'll second the David Gilmour addition.

Posted by: will on Jan. 25, 2006

"CMT - CWT, same diff."

Heh. Didn't have you pegged for a big fan. ;-)

Posted by: Matt on Jan. 25, 2006