...it's not dark yet, but it's gettin' there...

September 22, 2005

Apprentice Blogging

Apprentice blogging will get me through this slump.


Apprentice blogging will get me through this slump.

So i saw the premier of Martha Stewart's Apprentice last night and it was...

Oh wait. Dawn did that already. Aw hell, just go read hers.

Best line of course was at the end when Martha tells the firee that he didn't fail, he just "didn't fully succeed." i'll have to remember that one.

Dear Father,

i regret to tell you that i'll be moving home again on account of they kicked me out of law school. Something about spending less time on the internet and more time reading cases or something like that. Anyways, the good news is i didn't fail, i just didn't fully succeed.


Posted by annika, Sep. 22, 2005 | TrackBack (0)
Rubric: Arts


Hmm... You really are in a slump. Its way too obvious that you are trying to pick on somebody you dont like. I think martha's comment was ok. And im still pissed that you called britney skankwoman!

Posted by: jeff on Sep. 22, 2005

Jeff, you're young. You'll get over it. As for me, my years are few, and wasting time reading even half of that liveblog makes me feel resentful of the time I've lost.

I think that I'd like to smother fuck Martha. You know, where you hold the pillow over her face and she kicks and bucks like an animal? Trouble is, you can only do it once.

Posted by: Casca on Sep. 22, 2005

Hey casca......since when did they allow internet access to patients in mental institutions? Here I thought annika was some sweet innocent simple cali girl......what the heck kind of friends does she have?

Posted by: jeff on Sep. 22, 2005

Casca, where did we find this guy Jeff?

I thought I told him that Annika was a gay black guy in drag. I guess he doesn't believe me.

Now as to Martha.

I think it better to do a Rodeo with her. That's where you get behind her in a doggy position, reach down and tell her that her breasts feel almost as good as her sister's, then hit the stopwatch to see how long you can hold on.

When you are done, just shoot her with one of Annie's guns. You pick it, but I like the Glock 9MM at about 7 feet, using the standard Marine method of emptying the clip.

Posted by: shelly on Sep. 23, 2005

By the way, Annie, if you do not "totally succeed" in law school, I will personally hunt you down and shoot you. You are way too smart to let those jerks intimidate or depress you.

Don't you know the adage, "Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach."?

Law School Professors (with a few notable exceptions) could not make their way in the real world. Do not let them get you down. Remember, in about five years, you'll be able to buy and sell them and they'll be relying on your donations and those of others to get by.

Hang in there, we are really with you.

Posted by: shelly on Sep. 23, 2005

Shelly, do you work in D.C. by any chance? I work at a law firm (in IT) in Washington, and you kinda remind me of someone here.

Posted by: Victor on Sep. 23, 2005

and annika? If you leave law school, it'll be OK with me, if it's for the right reasons.

Flunking out or getting booted are wrong reasons and I will lose a tremendous amount of respect for you. BUT, if you feel the law isn't for you--by all means, beat feet. You have to try something before you know if it's for you; the law is no different.

I have a friend who went to law school, practiced for a couple of years, then decided she hated working in a firm. Private practice appealed to her even less. However, law school didn't go to waste--she started working in the legal dept for a local utility, and now she's one of their (rather succesful) executives. (Personally, I don't see you working as an exec. I see you opening up several very chic, very expensive shoe stores. Heckuva way to feed your habit :) )

Posted by: Victor on Sep. 23, 2005

C'mon, Annie, you're a 2L -- it gets easier from here on out! Let's not have any of this rubbish about getting kicked out; you're far, far too smart for that. Hell, if I made it you certainly can! Sounds like you need to decompress a little. If you're really exhausted by the blog, and/or it's taking up too much time, just give it a rest. We'd hate to see that happen, but we'd get over it; real life should be a much higher priority than the selfish wants of a bunch of strangers on the 'Net. And I think, in the end, most of us would rather see you do well for yourself than see you blog yourself into oblivion.

I would suggest that you throw a knees-up, get half-pissed and have a good knobbing -- but that'd be wrong. That'd be wrong. Right? Right! Right.

Posted by: Matt on Sep. 23, 2005

Annie, remember what I told you long ago?

First year they scare you to death. Second year they work you to death. Third year they bore you to death. Any way you look at it, you are dead for three years.

Even if you don't want to ever practice law, the education is worth the candle. You may not drop out for any reason, or you face the wrath of all of us who have been through the grinder and survived.

Victor, no, I have not worked in The District since 1962-3, when I began my career working for the Attorney General in D.C. Two winters and one summer was all I could bear, being an Angeleno, I was not able to acclimate to the severe weather, although working for Bobby was always a challenge.

The thought of facing a second summer of sweltering, oppressive heat from the swamp called the Potomac Basin was too much for a guy who lives in Santa Monica.

Besides, the women, while plentiful, just didn't have the style of the Southern California beauties to whom I had become accustomed.

But, living in Georgetown was fun during the winter, I have to give it that...

Posted by: shelly on Sep. 23, 2005

Gentlemen, gentlemen, if you think that anni would quit anything, excluding extreme circumstance, then you just don't know our girl. She's a rock. She's Santana Moss in the 4th Qtr on MNF. She's the Buckeye defense.

As for emptying the magazine "Marine style", we carried that ammo all the way out here. You didn't expect us to carry it back?

Posted by: Casca on Sep. 23, 2005

Well, he DID ask questions:

"Hey casca......since when did they allow internet access to patients in mental institutions?"

Like I said, you're young. It's a sick world, and I've always tried to be best.

"Here I thought annika was some sweet innocent simple cali girl."

You really need a firmer grip on reality as you sail through life, or you'll never get your bow into the wind.

"what the heck kind of friends does she have?"

The absolute very best kind... erudite, masculine, literate, loyal, realistic, well-rounded guys for the most part, except for Victor. He's just a perv.

Posted by: Casca on Sep. 23, 2005

Youth must be served; no one wants to be the waiter.

Posted by: shelly on Sep. 24, 2005

Did I miss something? I really did miss something, didn't I. What's all this nonsense about failing out? Annie riffed off Martha's quote, but I didn't catch the subtext that Annie was really writing about her own academic failure. How could she be failing already? The semester is still young.

A blogging slump, however, is something I can understand. Since Annie hates the American Skankwoman with such passon, here's a post I hope will amuse. In it, Britney Spears and Arnold Schwarzenegger discuss theories of mind while touching each other inappropriately.


Posted by: Kevin Kim on Sep. 24, 2005

Hey! no Ragging on Arnold! He is my hero, (really!)
I made it through Hurricane Rita without a scrape.
Just a little differnce between Texas and Louisiana,
We had a local Wal-mart looted, and sixteen looters were apprehended before they could make it out of the store!

Posted by: Kyle N on Sep. 24, 2005

Please tell me that they were hung in the parking lot as a warning to others?

I'm in the process of watching the Buckeyes DESTROY the Hawkeyes. If it wasn't for the refs it would have been 31 - zip at the half.

Life happens ten yards at a time.

Posted by: Casca on Sep. 24, 2005

Oregon 13, USC O.

Then the boys from Troy settled down.

Final, USC 45, Oregon 13.

Trojans rule; Ducks drool.

Posted by: shelly on Sep. 25, 2005

Casca, you shoot looters on sight, not hang them on sight. Takes too long.

For choice of weapon, see Annie's endless posts comparing Swiss, Italian, German and other exotic weaponary.

As I remember it, it was the Colt revolver that tamed the Wild West. A Colt .45 still is the gold standard for pure stopping power.

In close up and personal combat, I think one of those would end the debate quicker than stopping to hang some idiots who are solving their hunger and thirst by grabbing a big screen TV.

Posted by: shelly on Sep. 25, 2005

Easy on there old fruit, I think that I know how to put down insurrection. Nothing sends a message like bodys hanging from lamposts, whether they died that way or not is immaterial.

As for ducks and the dickcovers, I watched the game. The officials kept SC in it, and then gave it to them. Most of the country doesn't know this, because the game wasn't nationally televised. TWO OREGON TOUCHDOWNS WERE CALLED BACK!!! The officials were in the USC tank. USC is going to take an asswhiping. You heard it here first. Could be next week, or could be in early January in the Rose Bowl.

Posted by: Casca on Sep. 26, 2005

ASU? ASU? In OUR house? I'd say pretty doubtful

Maybe on January 4, if Texas gets an offense and defense that can go four quarters, it may be close, but not next week. And certainly not UCLA, either who also plays in our house this year. SC is three deep at every position, especially the interior lines. No other college team can keep up with them.

What you saw happen is that Oregon played the first string right through until they just plain tuckered out. Typical USC M.O.

See if you can say "Three-peat".

P.S. John David Booty will be better than Palmer or Leinart, and everyone knows it. Look for at least two more years of this fun, but even I can't say "Five-peat". But Pete Carroll can.

Posted by: shelly on Sep. 26, 2005

Dude, you got no D. I don't think Texas makes the run to the Roses. Oklahoma, Texas Tech, or the Aggies will trip them.

What I saw in Oregon was PAC 10 officiating propping up USC. It's hard to win when your TD's are called back, and no flags are thrown on the USC offense's obvious holding.

This is the same kind of shit that used to go on with Miami all the way through the championship in '02. Eventually a team comes along that doesn't buy the bullshit in the sportspages.

Posted by: Casca on Sep. 26, 2005

Some team like the toothless wonders of Stawberry Canyon?

You guys never cease to amaze me; they must put something in the water in Berkeley that creates permanent wishful thinking when you mix it with Cool-Aid.

You are looking at a dynasty; yup, the D is young and takes a little adjusting, but ater 13 quick ones, it was 45 to 0.

Shows me some D even if it was a 14 man formation. Hell, w've always had that...

Oklahoma is weak; Texas will whip them, but no one is going to beat USC this year, except maybe themselves. So far, the coaching has shown it is up to the task. Remember, Pete is a D coach.

Sorry, Bub, this is written down already; the only question is will they beat the spread? Saturday is is only 17, giving a slight nod to ASU's ability, I guess.

There is no money line. Surprise.

Posted by: shelly on Sep. 26, 2005

I'll type this real slow so you can understand what I'm saying. USC has no defense. When they play a team with a real defense, Leinart will fold like a cheap suit, and a real offense will have their way with the USC defense.

There are at least two teams in the country better than USC; Ohio State & VA Tech.

Posted by: Casca on Sep. 26, 2005

Granted, the Defense is young and somewhat inexperienced, but they are talented and deep, three deep at most positions. This gives them the ability to play moderately well throughout the game, as opposed to most others that have no depth.

When Booty gets a little better (he's gonna get a LOT better), they can platoon with him and Matt, and Reggie and Lendale, plus the rest of the line.

Watch closely; they will consistantly dominate the last half of the third and the fourth quarters.

No one is going to beat USC this year; they do not play the Hoakies, and the Buckeyes are unlikely to find their way to Pasadena. At least VaTech has a coach.

It's gonna be the Horns and the Trojans.

You can go back to typing fast. One article from a disgruntled Austin writer doesn't do it for me.

Fight On!!!

Posted by: shelly on Sep. 28, 2005

When it comes to football, you sir are a provencial hick.

Posted by: Casca on Sep. 28, 2005

I am not happy tonight. I wanted to watch the second edition of the Martha Stewart Apprentice show, and the local cable company lost both channel 4 and channel 7 at about 8:20 and didn't get them back until after 9. I ended up watching Rocky Laporte on Comedy Central, which was enjoyable, but Not Quite The Same.

Posted by: Ontario Emperor on Sep. 28, 2005


The playground way of signaling one is losing an argument is to resort to argumentum ad hominem.

I very may well be "provincial", in fact, I often wish I were, of course, referring to the coastal Southern area of France called the Cote d'Azur and also known as Provence.

The proof is in the pudding. If Ohio State (what ever happened to Woody Hayes' theory about not passing?) manages to grunt itself into Pasadena on January 4 and actually beats USC, I'll concede.

If not, USC still gets just about all the votes for first place, so the entire sports journalism fraternity must also be provincial, so I'll just hunker down and keep watching them win (and cover) every single week, Defense or no.

FIGHT ON!! (It has meaning, once again, but I doubt anyone not from USC can understand it)

Posted by: shelly on Sep. 29, 2005