...it's not dark yet, but it's gettin' there...
No Poetry Today, but be sure to check out Poetry Thursday on Hugo's blog tomorrow.
Update: Victor the Rat has unilaterally decided to turn this into Joe Don Baker Haiku Day, which is such an absurd idea that i have to give it my hearty endorsement.
annika isn't celebrating Poetry Day today. In protest, I'm turning her comments into Joe Don Baker Haiku Day. Frequent annika commenter Scof has already submitted an excellent one that offers an insight into JDB that I hadn't realized before. I, of course, have submitted a couple and I'll do a couple more before the day is over.i will judge all haikus submitted before 7:00 a.m. PDT tomorrow (for the benefit of my overseas visitors - Kevin Kim, that means you) and the winner gets a prize from my stash of highly coveted annika's journal merchandise!
Don't know who Joe Don Baker is? Click here.
Update: Deadline extended to 10:00 p.m. Thursday night.
Boo!
I'm going to turn this into "Joe Don Baker Haiku" day:
Vegas: C-O-D
Such a God-awful movie
Straight to D-V-D
Joe Don Baker is
The poor man's Fred Thompson, both
lawmen; don't take shit.
In "Charley Varrick"
Joe Don Baker is Molly!
What's with the girl's name?
Charley Varrick is one of my all time favorite 70's action flicks. In fact, i'd put it up there with Bullitt, Mr. Majestyk, and The Getaway. And i'm pleased to see i'm not the only one who noticed the resemblance between Joe Don Baker and Fred Thompson. For a long time i thought they were one and the same.
My favorite Joe Don Baker line from Charley Varrick: "I didn't come all this way for the amusement of idiots."
Posted by: annika! on Sep. 22, 2004Quote: I didn't come
all this way for the amuse-
ment of idiots.
NHL Ref'ree
Koharski looks like Joe Don.
He likes doughnuts, too.
Large is joe don's head
Which makes this all funny since
I thought he was dead
Remake Willard flick
Joe Don Baker in the lead
Victor's fantasy
Distracting Victor
From fantasy football league
Look! Joe Don Baker!
Dictionary page
Joe Don Baker defined as
Genius with a sneer
Baker, broad-shouldered:
late-night tv heroics,
stuff of my childhood...
Joe Don walked tall
When Dwayne Jonhson wore diapers.
Johnson is his bitch.
Joe Don, sixty-eight,
Lion in winter. Still not
One to trifle with.
Joe Don, hero of
MS3K for Mitchell.
At his worst, still fun.
I can't seem to get away from that "Joe Don" opening!
orphaned and feral
Joe Don Baker stopped drooling
only yesterday
but nobody knows:
Joe Don made a porno flick
it's called "Talking Balls"
Annika's secret
she's got a Joe Don tattoo
on her inner thigh
Joe Don Baker's ass
known throughout all Hollywood
as The Butt Unplugged
ask Joe Don nicely
give him lots of cash and he'll
gladly spoo your tits
I once saw Joe Don
tear a wolf in two using
only his nipples
Kevin
Joe Don Baker is
Gary Cooper in High Noon
for the Nascar set.
Joe Don Baker ain't
no faker like Sly Stallone,
who is five eight, maybe.
Groesbeck, Texas sits
sleepily west of Waco,
until the bar fight.
Like Joe Don Baker,
I'll need Double X Large size
from Annika's stash!
Gary Cooper is
Gary Cooper in High Noon
For the NASCAR set.
Joe Don is the king
Of redneck cops and puffy,
Drunk anti-heroes.
Just a guess: Joe Don
Has polished off many a
Bottle of Dickel.
I really like the Gary Cooper comparison though, gcotharn. I tried to do something similar and failed.
Matt, I didn't know you knew about Porkapalooza! Or did you just get lucky on a Google search?
You can't talk about
Mitchell without mentioning
The Blair Mitch Project
Mitchell! A cop with
A gun, a drink, and no friends.
Well, there's that hooker.
Appeared in Mitchell:
Carole Estes, Vick' Peters.
Never worked again.
An actor, Rob Narke,
worked in other movies but
only with Joe Don.
Talk about Wacko!
Andrew "Dice" Clay's first movie!
Another stinker.
Wacko shows pics of
Joe Don Baker in a dress!
Please take me now, Lord.
Victor,
You, sir, are a god. And you pull it off without alluding to secretory functions or vaguely autoerotic discussions of Annie's inner thigh. (Not that there's anything wrong, per se, with either of those things.) I tip my hat to you.
And I just got lucky on Porkapalooza.
Posted by: Matt on Sep. 23, 2004Joe Don Baker: the
Brian Dennehy of 'necks.
First Blood needed him.
I am not the first
To notice the resemblance.
See TV's Hard Stick.
Now Matt, you open up a whole new can of worms about the resemblance between Brian Dennehy and the late Brian Keith
Posted by: annika on Sep. 23, 2004Ring of Steel! Joe Don
wants you to face your dest'ny!
At least it has boobs.
Matt, thank you for the comments. In case you hadn't noticed, I'm a huuuge JDB fan. I'm actually holding back a bit, if only because I'm at work.
Posted by: Victor on Sep. 23, 2004The haiku is done
Where is Annika now that
We need her wit now?
Shelly? Is that you? Is that the same long-lost little lamb from the JDB Discussion list?
Posted by: Victor on Sep. 23, 2004I don't know what's more disturbing; the fact that someone from the JDB discussion list found their way here just because of the JDB haiku, or the fact that a JDB discussion list even exists.
Posted by: Ted on Sep. 23, 2004Instead of working,
I'm checking to see if I
scored Annika graft!
Sadly, XXL
costs too much to be conferred
by a law student!
Matt- Thanks for the compliment! You have a point: Gary Cooper is Gary Cooper for people like me:
gcotharn: Bubba
watching High Noon late at night
and tapping keyboard.
But sometimes Gary Cooper is only a rumor:
Some Bubbas are not
awake to watch High Noon on
TCM Late Night.
Some Bubbas do not
visit Black and White Classics
at the Blockbuster.
To the contest!
Isn't it sad when
Joe Don and Fred Thom are more
real than: Kerry, John?
I can pay bills if
I go back to work now. Its
what Joe Don would do.
Great shades of Elvis,
Rocking the gates of Graceland.
Who is this Joe Don Baker?
I don't know Joe Don.
Don't really give a rat's ass.
Wrote a haiku, though!
:)
Posted by: Tuning Spork on Sep. 23, 2004Time's up.
Posted by: annika! on Sep. 23, 2004
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